Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Been 5 months

I can hardly fathom that yesterday marked 5 months since Tommy passed away! Around 7 last night, I curled up on my bed with his Wub (little red dog he slept with every night since he was 3 months old) and had myself a good little cry. As the first silent tear fell, Calli, our cat, meowed and jumped on the bed. She nuzzled me and licked my nose. Then she curled up next to me as close as she could get and just laid there for me to hold. I knew Tommy whispered in her ear to comfort me.

Today we took Brandon to his new doctor. He's been put back on the Tenex for now, but the doctor told me he would not be surprised if he didn't need a stimulant as well in the near future. Brandon was so out of control that the doctor didn't even hesitate to write the prescription. Brandon has been out of medication for about a month now, so this is a welcomed change.

Rob and I are doing wonderful. We've recommitted ourselves to our marriage and family. It's a fresh start for us and we couldn't be happier. Life is good. He's getting unemployment again so we have some income now. As soon as we get our W2s in the mail and can file our taxes, we are going to use the refund to travel back to South Carolina to get our belongings out of storage. I can't wait to have that bill eliminated!

We've also ordered internet! Woo-Hoo! I should be online at home by Monday afternoon. Cable internet here is so inexpensive. In Charleston, we were paying about $65 a month for internet. Here, we will be paying about $25. What a huge difference. Now I can post my resume in the middle of the night instead of going into town and sitting in the library parking lot. And, I can keep up this blog on a regular basis again.

I knew this already, but the past year has just brought it to the forefront. Every day is a miracle. Cherish what you have in your life, because it can be gone in second. Hug the ones you love. TELL them you love them. I was holding Tommy less than an hour before he died. He was just here. I guess I'm glad that at the time, I didn't realize we were losing him, but if I could go back, I would have climbed on that bed with him and held him as he took his last breath and kissed his tiny head while there was still life in him.

I found several pictures and video "hidden" in my computer this morning. Brandon and I have had a great time reliving our memories. We are going to participate in a CHD awareness walk. Please check out the link and join us if you can. God's Special Hearts . God's Special Hearts has a paypal button at the bottom of the page on this link. No money will go to me personally, but to the organization to help other kids with heart defects. My mother in law walked last year while I was in Charleston. This year, we are walking together, along with a friend or two coming in from out of state in Tommy's honor. Feel free to contact them and join us at the walk.

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Diagram of Tommy's Heart Defects

Diagram of Tommy's Heart Defects
Double Inlet Left Ventricle with Transpostion of the Great Arteries